Underwire Bra Dilemma

Visitor’s Cannot Wear Underwire Bra

If you are a woman, could you imagine being turned away from visiting your loved one because of the type of bra you’re wearing?  Well nowadays you can be turned away from a visit if you are wearing an underwire bra. Phyllis witnessed an event with an elderly woman who, well, let’s hear how she tells the story:

Phyllis’ recount of the day she witnessed an elderly woman that was going to be denied visitation because she was wearing an underwire bra

The Guard started yelling, “YOU MUST HAVE ON AN UNDERWIRE BRA!! YOU CANNOT WEAR AN UNDERWIRE BRA !!”

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It was a very cold, cloudy, winter day. I was there by myself; I was the only one in our family (at that time) approved for visitation, so, I was there by myself. This was only the second time I had visited. I had learned after the first visit that I needed to be there as soon as possible at 8am, because only the first 20 families are allowed to visit. We lined up, and at exactly 8am visitors are allowed to enter through the “sally port” double door sliding gate system.

You have probably heard in the movies or on t.v. about that clinking thud sound of the closing gate behind you. Never in my wildest nightmares did I ever think I would be walking into a prison. But here I am, by myself, to visit my grandson. I walked in with a group of people not knowing what to do. I keenly watched everyone’s move trying to copy and understand what I was supposed to do. There is no information given out about the visiting procedures. There are no flyers on the wall to guide the visitors. Oh, there are lots of flyers on the wall stating the rules, some contradicting what the flyer posted right next to it states. What color shirt you may or may not be allowed to wear or you cannot wear sweat pants but don’t wear skinny leg pants.

Even though there are people standing at the counter talking to the guard, I approach the counter and ask for a number. It’s like when you’re in the deli line waiting for your turn to order. I sit down and listen for my number to be called. The room is full of people chit chatting, children running around playing games with each other, and a t.v. is on, so the guard has to YELL out the number several times.

When your number is called, you/your group goes to the counter, gives the guard the DOC Prison Number assigned to your loved one, also your driver’s license and you write down your info on the clipboard form. I panic every time to recount that number, I stumble to call it out, that number, which is now itched in my memory forever, but still freeze like a deer in headlights… what is his number? I know I know it….what is it?

You hand over anything you will be putting in the small locker (less than 1 foot squared by 3feet depth) so it can be put through the x-ray machine. It’s not much, because you’re not allowed to bring in much—your car key & your jacket/coat. You’re given a Visitor’s Badge that you must wear at all times, it’s just a number…everything is just a number. You’re given the locker key and given back your coat.

Put your items in the locker and sit down to wait….again. Next time, your actual last name is called out, again the guard has to yell it out to be heard. There are bins like you use in airports to put in your items to go through the x-ray machine, your shoes, your belt, watch, your visitor’s badge–because it has a metal clip, your clear ziploc bag of $20 quarters (not in the rolls that come from the bank—just loose quarters in the bag).  No other money is allowed, be sure your pockets are empty of any other coins…empty of anything.  Step over for an invasive pat down, to be frisked, touched and searched. Spread your legs wide, stick your arms straight out besides you and get ready. If you’re wearing pants that are somewhat narrow, be prepared to have them jerked out away from your leg because if there is not give you are turned away. Lift up each foot so they can see the bottoms of your feet. Here’s something new this time, open your mouth and stick your tongue out. Oh no, this means some idiot tried to sneak in something in their mouth. And then, here it is, step through the metal detector with lots of prayers it doesn’t go off, because if it does, it’s going to hit the fan!!

Here starts my story of that dreary day. A family consisting of an 80 something year old granny with a urine bag hanging off her side, her daughter who is carrying a toddler, and two teenage sons. I’m estimating it’s the granny’s great grandsons and their little baby sister.

The boys are processed first, and all is well. Then it’s time for the toddler, the guard Insists that the toddler MUST walk on her own thru the metal detector. The moment her mom puts her down on the floor in front of the metal detector the precious little girl starts screaming and crying. Meanwhile the guard is insisting the girl go ahead and walk through. The frantic mom tries coaxing her to go with no avail. Finally a thought, she calls one of the boys to come over and stand on the other side and call the girl to come to him. It took some time, but it worked!! Yes!! However, the girl continues to cry even after he has scooped her up in his arms. The mom is next. We are all very thankful in the room because when mom makes it to the other side, she immediately takes the toddler: quiet, the poor tortured toddler stops crying.

Time for Granny and all is well until she walks through the metal detector, and all chaos breaks loose. We had only thought it was chaos concerning the toddler, but this was worse. We all thought it was going to be the colostomy bag that caused the problem. But no, when the guard used the personal metal detector wand, it immediately sounded off around granny’s heart.

The Guard started yelling, “YOU MUST HAVE ON AN UNDERWIRE BRA!! YOU CANNOT WEAR AN UNDERWIRE BRA !!”

Little Granny replied, “I don’t know, it’s just a cheap bra from Walmart, I don’t know if it is an underwire bra.”

The guard yelled again, “I CANNOT LET YOU GO IN WITH AN UNDERWIRE BRA!!”

Granny replied, “Ok, ok…I’ll take it off, I’ll just take it off.”

The Guard yelled, “OH NO YOU WON’T TAKE IT OFF, YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO GO IN WITHOUT WEARING A BRA !!”

Remember, her two great-grandsons are standing there listening to all of this. Granny had to be petrified that her two great-grandsons were listening to their Granny discussing her bra. And mind you, there were other families with boys and men in the lobby.

Granny asked, “Do you have some scissors? I’ll go into the restroom and cut out the underwire.”

The guard yells back, “THIS IS A PRISON, OF COURSE I DON’T HAVE SCISSORS, SCISSORS ARE WEAPONS!!”

Granny gives up, looks at her family on the other side of the half wall and tells them to go ahead and go visit, and she’ll just wait for them. As Granny walks to the few chairs in the lobby, the lady sitting next to me stands up and talks to Granny. The two of them go into the ladies room.

After a while, the two come out of the restroom and Granny goes back up to the guard’s desk. The guard takes her back through the inspection process and at the end, this time, Granny walks though the metal detector with complete silence.

The lady that was sitting next to me returns and I lean over and whisper, “What happened?”  The kind, generous lady answers back, “I’ve already had my visit and I’m waiting to be released to go, so I gave her my sports bra that has no wires in it.”

I know the families in the lobby wanted so much to speak up to the guard and tell her to calm down, quit yelling at this little ole granny and show some RESPECT!! So, embarrassed for the Granny, for her great-grandson and for all of us.  At least I felt that way and I’m sure others did to and most likely they were scared, like me, that we couldn’t speak up or we would lose our privilege to visit our family member held on the other side of the metal detector, through the locked doors, down the hall, and through more locked doors. Yes, we were all there to visit our family member who may or may not have committed a crime, but we are innocent and did not commit a crime, we are decent people, we are good people, yes, that’s it….we are people who deserved to be treated as human beings !!

P.S.  It took a few weeks, but THAT GUARD does NOT work there anymore!!